Ever since my son, Jalen was born, I really try to be in the moment. I try to be present as much as I can, but that’s hard to do because you always have to be two steps ahead in order to operate like a normal person with little to no sleep. At night, I lay in bed, exhausted wanting to do more of everything I didn’t get to do that day and most nights, I always feel some what guilty for not doing enough to record Jalen’s growth process. Especially for his first year. I started writing in my journal ever since he was born, but somehow I fell behind and the last entry was written, well… 4 months ago. So as of last month, I made a promise to myself that I would photograph him at least once a week and post one entry to help me stay on top of this daunting task. Or at least that’s how I feel at the end of the day. If you have a newborn or a toddler, you know what I’m talking about.

Today, I watched him play with his toy that his auntie Heather (a.k.a.HLo) sent to him all the way from Sacramento. It was her son, Joaquin’s toy that she passed on to him along with some clothes and more toys. Thanks HLo! It’s amazing to me how much he is changing from week to week. He is now sitting up by himself without our help, crawling from one place to another trying to grab everything in sight with his precious tiny fingers. And of course, if he can get his hands on anything, it ends up in his mouth. It’s impossible to keep track of what’s acceptable and what’s not. I try my best NOT to freak out about everything and let him just be… because that’s what babies do. I happily let my mom freak out instead. LOL!!! I can only imagine how tired I’ll be once he starts walking!

I must admit, I really love this stage in his life. Being able to interact with him the way I do on daily basis gives me so much satisfaction and joy. I know some mothers really love the newborn stage vs. toddler stage. But for me, the newborn stage was really hard. Overall, Jalen was a good boy. However, him not being able to sleep through the night was a torture. Everyone told me it was pretty normal, so I just had to have faith knowing that he will soon sleep through the night. Once he reached 6 1/2 months, closer to 7 months, he eventually did. Thank GOD! The first 6 months of his and my mine was a blur, for most part. Being sleep deprived and learning how to joggle my life that is no longer mine, I felt as though I’ve been living under a rock not realizing what else is happening around the world. I try to stay current by watching NPR news with my husband every night, but sometimes I’m too tired to even watch any TV. I usually want to pass out by 6pm when I put Jalen to sleep. What has happened to my life, I wonder. Oh yeah. I have a baby now! HA!

I just love his onesie from Nana, my mother-in-law. She sent this cute bat onesie for his first Halloween this past week. Isn’t it adorable? It’s perfect for Austin since we are known for bats!

I get to spend every waking moment with him, watch him be the little precocious boy that he is, and I am forever grateful that I am able to be a stay-at-home mom. It is the hardest job I have ever had and I would never trade it for anything in this world. To me luxury is to be at home with my son and nothing is better than that.

“When you put faith, hope and love together, you can raise positive kids in a negative world.” – Zig Ziglar